I wonder why some people like lists and others don’t. I’m a list person. I make lists for everything. Grocery lists, to-do lists, Christmas lists, monetary goals list, lists of books I want to read, yadda yadda, on and on. My penchant for lists is probably why I like websites like Good Reads and Netflix. They are essentially websites where I put books and movies on my list. And I love to open Calibre and see the long list of books. I can spend hours just trying to figure out what book to read next. Recently we’ve been making dinner menu lists for the week. Before we started making dinner menu lists we would frequently have text conversations like this:
Rich: What do you want for dinner?
Me: Sounds good. Chicken and…?
Rich: and what?
Me: How about a vegetable and a starch?
Rich: Salad. What’s a starch?
Me: Pasta. Do we have salad dressing? Tomatoes? Cucumber? What’s in this salad?
Rich: Lettuce. We have olives. No dressing. Do we have pasta sauce?
Me: IDK, I’m not on the boat. We have oil and vinegar. Make a dressing. Not too much salt! Not half a cup of oil like last time. Can you look in the cupboards for sauce or canned tomatoes or pesto or anything that can go on pasta?
Rich: Which cupboards?
Me: Forget it. I’m having soup.
Rich: Sounds good. Chicken isn’t thawed anyway. Where’s the soup? Do we have crackers?
Rich is an occasional list maker. He’ll make lists for things he needs to buy, or projects he needs to work on, but he’s wary of lists. If I try to make a list with timelines or deadlines, he freaks; the pressure builds and angry conversations ensue. But having known Rich for 19 years, I know he’s scattered and easily distracted. He needs lists to keep him on track. Without our pre-move-in list I don’t think we’d be moved in yet. Or we would, but we wouldn’t have running water or a toilet or a way to cook anything. I like having deadlines. It keeps me motivated and moving forward. I don’t always complete what I want by the deadline, so like any normal person, I re-evaluate and adjust the deadline. That’s where Rich’s problem lies. He’s not normal. He sees a deadline and his mind turns that date into an ever approaching apocalyptic moment. He resents the lists, but he loves crossing completed items off and he’s always so relieved when I say “let’s re-evaluate the projects and dates and figure out a doable timeline.” But until I say that he grumbles and grouses and is generally unpleasant.
All this is really just to say we’ve updated our project lists